The Cheaper Solution
A lady went to a psychiatrist complaining of a terrible phobia.
“Every time I lay down on my bed I get this terrible fear that there is something underneath."
“Wow!” responded the psychiatrist “I’ve never heard of such a phobia, but like all phobias it can be treated, but it will likely take around 20 sessions.”
“Okay,” responded the lady “how much is each session?”
“Oh it’s just $80 a session, but trust me it’s well worth it.”
When the lady didn’t come back to the psychiatrist he gave the lady a call.
“How come I didn’t hear from you?” He asked.
Seeing Eye Dogs
Two men, Jim and John, were walking their dogs when they passed by a restaurant.
Shorts
“Every time I lay down on my bed I get this terrible fear that there is something underneath."
“Wow!” responded the psychiatrist “I’ve never heard of such a phobia, but like all phobias it can be treated, but it will likely take around 20 sessions.”
“Okay,” responded the lady “how much is each session?”
“Oh it’s just $80 a session, but trust me it’s well worth it.”
When the lady didn’t come back to the psychiatrist he gave the lady a call.
“How come I didn’t hear from you?” He asked.
“Well”
responded the lady “when I came home and told my husband about the cost
he thought he would save some money, he just cut the legs off the bed!”
Seeing Eye Dogs
Two men, Jim and John, were walking their dogs when they passed by a restaurant.
“Let’s go in and get something to eat,” Jim suggested.
“We can’t” responded John, “don’t you see the sign says NO PETS ALLOWED.”
“Aah that sign,” said Jim “don’t worry about it.” Taking out a pair of sunglasses, he walked up to the door.
As he tried walking into the restaurant he got stopped at the door, “sorry no pets allowed.”
"Can’t you see” said Jim “I am blind, this is my seeing eye dog.”
But it’s a doberman pincher, who uses a doberman pincher as a seeing eye dog?” the man asked.
“Oh,” Jim responded “you must have not heard, this is the latest type of seeing eye dog, they do a very good job.”
Seeing that it worked, John tried walking in with his Chihuahua. Even before he could open his mouth, the doorman said “don’t tell me that a Chihuahua is the latest type of seeing eye dog.”
Thinking quickly John responded in a angry voice “You mean they gave me a Chihuahua?”
“Aah that sign,” said Jim “don’t worry about it.” Taking out a pair of sunglasses, he walked up to the door.
As he tried walking into the restaurant he got stopped at the door, “sorry no pets allowed.”
"Can’t you see” said Jim “I am blind, this is my seeing eye dog.”
But it’s a doberman pincher, who uses a doberman pincher as a seeing eye dog?” the man asked.
“Oh,” Jim responded “you must have not heard, this is the latest type of seeing eye dog, they do a very good job.”
Seeing that it worked, John tried walking in with his Chihuahua. Even before he could open his mouth, the doorman said “don’t tell me that a Chihuahua is the latest type of seeing eye dog.”
Thinking quickly John responded in a angry voice “You mean they gave me a Chihuahua?”
Shorts
I can't wait till New Year's Day 2021. Then I can say hindsight is really 2020.
Told the kids we could make pancakes since we haven't had breakfast all year.
@simoncholland
I
like getting my haircut because staring directly into your own face for
30 minutes is the best way to experience the five stages of grief.
@dadandburied
Sign up
for any one of our eNewsletters and stay informed on the latest new
products, emerging technologies, and time-saving strategies in the
industry. These industry focused newsletters give you the information
you need, delivered right to your inbox.
