Email Commandments
- Thou shalt include a clear and specific subject line.
- Thou shalt edit any quoted text down to the minimum thou needest.
- Thou shalt read thine own message thrice before sendest it.
- Thou shalt ponder how thy recipient might react to thy message.
- Thou shalt check thy spelling and thy grammar.
- Thou shalt not curse, flame, spam or USE all CAPS.
- Thou shalt not forward any chain letter.
- Thou shalt not rely on the privacy of email, especially from work.
- Thou shalt not use email for any illegal or unethical purpose.
- When in doubt, save thy message overnight and reread it in the light of the dawn.
- That which thou findest hateful to receive, sendest thou not unto others.
A Man and His Camel
There's this guy walking along a road to town with his camel.
Along the way, a guy stops and ask's if he needs a ride to town. The guy says, "Yeah," and hops in. The driver asks "What about your camel?"
The guy replies, "Oh, he's okay... he knows his way to town."
So the driver start's driving, gets up to about 45 MPH, looks in his rearview mirror and sees the camel right behind him. He says to the guy, "Hey buddy ya know your camel is behind us?
The guy replies, "Yeah it's okay, he knows his way to town. Speed up a little."
The driver speeds up to about 55 MPH, he's driving along, and look's behind him and again see's the camel. He says to the guy, "Your camel is still there."
The guy replies, "Really it's okay, he knows his way to town. Speed up a little."
So the driver speeds up to 65 MPH. He drives for a bit, look's behind him, then looks at the guy and says, "Hey buddy your camel, he's looking pretty rough."
The guy replies, "Oh yeah? What's he doing?"
The driver says, "Well, his ear's are folded back and his tongue is hanging out."
The guy replies, "His tongue is hanging out? Which side?"
The driver says, "The left side."
The guy replies, "You'd better hold your course... he's fixin to pass ya!"
Extra Birds
The farmer's son was returning from the market with the crate of chickens his father had entrusted to him, when all of a sudden the box fell and broke open. Chickens scurried off in different directions, but the determined boy walked all over the neighborhood scooping up the wayward birds and returning them to the repaired crate.
Hoping he had found them all, the boy reluctantly returned home, expecting the worst. "Pa, the chickens got loose," the boy confessed sadly. "But I managed to find all twelve of them."
"Well, you did real good, son," the farmer beamed. "You left with seven."
Shorts
It's like my dad always said to me, "Which one are you again?"
@samgrittner
In marriage, the degrees of right and wrong are measured in obviousness.
@theboydp
You learn a lot when you children start moving out. For example, you may go upstairs and learn that you no longer own a couch.
@3sunzzz
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