9 Things Mom Would Never Say
“How on earth can you see the TV sitting so far back?”
“Yeah, I used to skip school a lot, too.”
“Just leave all the lights on … it makes the house look more cheery.”
“Let me smell that shirt — Yeah, it’s good for another week.”
“Go ahead and keep that stray dog, honey. I’ll be glad to feed and walk him every day.”
“Well, if Rahul’s mamma says it’s OK, that’s good enough for me.”
“The curfew is just a general time to shoot for. It’s not like I’m running a prison around here.”
“I don’t have a tissue with me… just use your sleeve.”
White Hair
One day, a little girl is sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly notices that her mother has several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast to her brunette hair. She looks at her mother and inquisitively asks: “Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?”
Her mother replied: “Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white.”
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then asked: “Mommy, how come all of grandma’s hairs are white?”
Fred is 32 years old and he is still single.
One day a friend asked, “Why aren’t you married? Can’t you find a woman who will be a good wife?”
Fred replied, “Actually, I’ve found many women I wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn’t like them.”
His friend thinks for a moment and says, “I’ve got the perfect solution, just find a girl who’s just like your mother.”
A few months later they meet again and his friend says, “Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?”
With a frown on his face, Fred answers, “Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much.”
The friend said, “Then what’s the problem?”
Fred replied, “My father doesn’t like her.”
Shorts
“Yeah, I used to skip school a lot, too.”
“Just leave all the lights on … it makes the house look more cheery.”
“Let me smell that shirt — Yeah, it’s good for another week.”
“Go ahead and keep that stray dog, honey. I’ll be glad to feed and walk him every day.”
“Well, if Rahul’s mamma says it’s OK, that’s good enough for me.”
“The curfew is just a general time to shoot for. It’s not like I’m running a prison around here.”
“I don’t have a tissue with me… just use your sleeve.”
“Don’t bother wearing a jacket – the wind-chill is bound to improve.
White Hair
One day, a little girl is sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly notices that her mother has several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast to her brunette hair. She looks at her mother and inquisitively asks: “Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?”
Her mother replied: “Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white.”
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then asked: “Mommy, how come all of grandma’s hairs are white?”
Fred is 32 years old and he is still single.
One day a friend asked, “Why aren’t you married? Can’t you find a woman who will be a good wife?”
Fred replied, “Actually, I’ve found many women I wanted to marry, but when I bring them home to meet my parents, my mother doesn’t like them.”
His friend thinks for a moment and says, “I’ve got the perfect solution, just find a girl who’s just like your mother.”
A few months later they meet again and his friend says, “Did you find the perfect girl? Did your mother like her?”
With a frown on his face, Fred answers, “Yes, I found the perfect girl. She was just like my mother. You were right, my mother liked her very much.”
The friend said, “Then what’s the problem?”
Fred replied, “My father doesn’t like her.”
Shorts
Almost time for my kids to get out of school and start on their summe rproject to air condition the entire neighborhood.
@simondcholland
@simondcholland
I don’t know what my husband is planning on doing for me for Mother's Day but I hope it's the laundry.
@sarcasticmommy4
@sarcasticmommy4
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