Doing Their Homework
When Dad came home he was astonished to see Vic sitting on a horse, writing something.
"What on earth are you doing there?' he asked.
"Well, the teacher told us to write an essay on our favorite animal." answered Vic.
A Pirate Walks Into a Bar
A pirate walks into a bar with an eyepatch, pegleg, and hook for a hand. The bartender notices his leg, "How did you get that pegleg?"
The pirate replies, "It were many years ago. I were walkin' on the deck when a wave swept a shark aboard. The shark bit my leg off!"
"Wow," replies the bartender. "What about that hand?"
The pirate replies, "It were many years ago. I were walkin' on the deck when a wave swept a killer whale aboard. The whale bit my hand off!"
"Oh," replies the bartender. "How about the eye?"
The pirate replies, "It were many years ago. I were walkin' on the deck when a seagull came outta nowhere and pooped in my eye."
"And that blinded you?" asked the bartender.
"No, it twas my first day with the hook."
Back to School Shorts
Nathan comes home from his first day at school. Mother asks, "What did you learn today?" He replies, "Not enough. I have to go back tomorrow."
Mia: I think we need a new teacher. Mum: Why is that? Mia: Our teacher doesn't know anything, she keeps asking us for the answers.
"What on earth are you doing there?' he asked.
"Well, the teacher told us to write an essay on our favorite animal." answered Vic.
"That's why I'm here and that's why Sara's sitting in the goldfish bowl."
Know Your Faculty
A head teacher is making his rounds of the school when he hears a terrible commotion coming from one of the classrooms. He rushes in and spots one boy, taller than the others, who seems to be making the most noise.
He seizes the lad, drags him to the hall, and tells him to wait there until he is excused.
Returning to the classroom, the head teacher restores order and lectures the class for half an hour about the importance of good behaviour.
"Now," he says, "are there any questions?"
One girl stands up timidly. "Please sir," she asks, "may we have our teacher back?"
Know Your Faculty
A head teacher is making his rounds of the school when he hears a terrible commotion coming from one of the classrooms. He rushes in and spots one boy, taller than the others, who seems to be making the most noise.
He seizes the lad, drags him to the hall, and tells him to wait there until he is excused.
Returning to the classroom, the head teacher restores order and lectures the class for half an hour about the importance of good behaviour.
"Now," he says, "are there any questions?"
One girl stands up timidly. "Please sir," she asks, "may we have our teacher back?"
A Pirate Walks Into a Bar
A pirate walks into a bar with an eyepatch, pegleg, and hook for a hand. The bartender notices his leg, "How did you get that pegleg?"
The pirate replies, "It were many years ago. I were walkin' on the deck when a wave swept a shark aboard. The shark bit my leg off!"
"Wow," replies the bartender. "What about that hand?"
The pirate replies, "It were many years ago. I were walkin' on the deck when a wave swept a killer whale aboard. The whale bit my hand off!"
"Oh," replies the bartender. "How about the eye?"
The pirate replies, "It were many years ago. I were walkin' on the deck when a seagull came outta nowhere and pooped in my eye."
"And that blinded you?" asked the bartender.
"No, it twas my first day with the hook."
Back to School Shorts
Nathan comes home from his first day at school. Mother asks, "What did you learn today?" He replies, "Not enough. I have to go back tomorrow."
Mia: I think we need a new teacher. Mum: Why is that? Mia: Our teacher doesn't know anything, she keeps asking us for the answers.
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