Jumpy Taxi Driver
A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question.
The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped inches from a shop window.
For a second, everything was quiet in the cab. Then the driver said, "Look, mate, don't ever do that again. You scared the living daylights out of me!"
The passenger apologized and said, "I didn't realize that a little tap would scare you so much."
A guy said to God, "God, is it true that to you a billion years is like a second?"
God said yes.
The guy said, "God, is it true that to you a billion dollars is like a penny?"
God said yes.
The guy said, "God, can I have a penny?"
God said, "Sure, just a second."
-Mark DeBolt
Shorts
The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped inches from a shop window.
For a second, everything was quiet in the cab. Then the driver said, "Look, mate, don't ever do that again. You scared the living daylights out of me!"
The passenger apologized and said, "I didn't realize that a little tap would scare you so much."
The
driver replied, "Sorry, it's not really your fault. Today is my first
day as a cab driver — I've been driving a funeral van for the last 25
years."
A guy said to God, "God, is it true that to you a billion years is like a second?"
God said yes.
The guy said, "God, is it true that to you a billion dollars is like a penny?"
God said yes.
The guy said, "God, can I have a penny?"
God said, "Sure, just a second."
-Mark DeBolt
Shorts
I feel sorry for Netflix era
kids. They will never know the high stakes adrenaline of running to the
bathroom/fridge/bedroom in a single ad break, with the beckoning call o
fa sibling screaming "It's ONNNN" to send you hurdling over furniture to
get back in time.
@flossaus
Before I had kids I thought a parent’s role was centered around building confidence, love and creativity. Now that I have kids I see the role is to wear the kid out to make it to nap time then wear the kid out again to make it to bed time. Then repeat that. Everyday.
@cydbeer
@flossaus
Before I had kids I thought a parent’s role was centered around building confidence, love and creativity. Now that I have kids I see the role is to wear the kid out to make it to nap time then wear the kid out again to make it to bed time. Then repeat that. Everyday.
@cydbeer
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